Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover Definition

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"Hey, this is Phil. Leave me a message, or don't, but do me a favor: don't text me, it's gay."
Stu: Why are you peppering the steak? You don't know if tigers like pepper. Alan: Tigers *love* pepper. They hate cinnamon.
"I'm on your side! I hate Godzilla! I hate him too! I hate him! He destroys cities! *Please*! This isn't your fault. I'll get you some pants."
Stu: Ew! Alan, did you just eat sofa pizza? Alan: Yes.
Woman in Elevator: Oh, how cute. What's his name? Phil: Ben. Alan: Carlos.
"Don't let the beard fool you. He's a child!"
"Hey, you guys ready to let the dogs out?"
Alan: I've found a baby before. Stu: You found a baby before? Where? Alan: Coffee Bean.
"Would you please put some pants on? I feel weird having to ask you twice."
Alan: Seriously, I don't care what happens. I don't care if we kill someone. Doug: What? Alan: You heard me. It's Sin City. I won't tell a soul.
Stu: “She is wearing my grandmother’s Holocaust ring.”
Alan: “I didn’t know they gave out rings at the Holocaust.”
“We’re not going to leave a baby in the room. There’s a fucking tiger in the bathroom.”
“Tigers love pepper. They hate cinnamon.”
Sid (Jeffrey Tambor): “Remember what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That shit’ll come back with you.”
Male Officer: Handsome your next (Talking about Phil)  (Alan walks forward)
Male Officer: Not you fat Jesus
“Doug is probably dead, face down in a ditch and getting butt fucked by a meth addict”
“Whose baby is that?”
“Check its collar or something.”
“Tracy (Sasha Barrese): “We’re getting married in five hours.”
Phil: “Yeah … that’s not gonna happen.”
Alan (to hotel clerk): Is this hotel beeper friendly? I’m not getting a signal. Where is your bank of pay phones?”
Dr. Valsh (Matt Walsh): “It’s on the corner of ‘get a map’ and ‘fuckoff.’”
Alan: “Next week’s no good for me. The Jonas Brothers are in town.”
“Paging Dr. Faggot!”
Alan: I’m sure you get this a lot, but is this really Ceasar’s Palace?
Hotel Clerk: What do you mean?
Alan: Did Ceasar really live here?
Hotel Clerk: No
Alan: Didn’t think so
Stu: “Everyone says Mike Tyson is such a badass, but I think he’s kind of a sweetheart.”
Alan: “I think he’s mean.”
Alan: “I shouldn’t be here. I’m not supposed to be within 200 feet of a school. Or a Chuck E. Cheese.”
Alan: “Hey! There were skittles in there!”
What do tigers dream of
When they take a little tiger snooze?
Do they dream of mauling zebras
Or Halle Berry in her cat women suit.
Well don’t you worry your pretty stripped head
Were going to get you back to Tyson and your cozy tiger bed.
And then were going to find our best friend Doug,
And then were going to give him a best friend hug.
Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Dougy, Dougy, Doug, Doug.
But if he’s been murder by crystal meth tweekers,
Well then were shit out of luck.
Walking is the best possible exercise. Habituate yourself to walk very fast.
Thomas Jefferson
Leave all the afternoon for exercise and recreation, which are as necessary as reading. I will rather say more necessary because health is worth more than learning.
Thomas Jefferson
Exercise to stimulate, not to annihilate. The world wasn't formed in a day, and neither were we. Set small goals and build upon them.
Lee Haney
Depend upon yourself. Make your judgement trustworthy by trusting it. You can develop good judgement as you do the muscles of your body - by judicious, daily exercise. To be known as a man of sound judgement will be much in your favor.
Grantland Rice
Advocates of capitalism are very apt to appeal to the sacred principles of liberty, which are embodied in one maxim: The fortunate must not be restrained in the exercise of tyranny over the unfortunate.
Bertrand Russell
The joy of life consists in the exercise of one's energies, continual growth, constant change, the enjoyment of every new experience. To stop means simply to die. The eternal mistake of mankind is to set up an attainable ideal.
Aleister Crowley
Exercise is bunk. If you are healthy, you don't need it: if you are sick you should not take it.
Henry Ford
A business has to be involving, it has to be fun, and it has to exercise your creative instincts.
Richard Branson
Training gives us an outlet for suppressed energies created by stress and thus tones the spirit just as exercise conditions the body.
Arnold Schwarzenegger
To be wholly devoted to some intellectual exercise is to have succeeded in life.
Robert Louis Stevenson
If we could give every individual the right amount of nourishment and exercise, not too little and not too much, we would have found the safest way to health.
Hippocrates
To feel much for others and little for ourselves; to restrain our selfishness and exercise our benevolent affections, constitute the perfection of human nature.
Adam Smith
Business, more than any other occupation, is a continual dealing with the future; it is a continual calculation, an instinctive exercise in foresight.
Henry R. Luce
It strikes me as odd that the free exercise of religious faith is sometimes treated as a problem, something America is stuck with instead of blessed with.
Mitt Romney
Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order.
John Adams
Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
Lucius Annaeus Seneca I exercise everyday. I swim, I bike, I run and I go to the gym.
Lance Armstrong
I repeat... that all power is a trust; that we are accountable for its exercise; that from the people and for the people all springs, and all must exist.
Benjamin Disraeli
If a man achieves victory over this body, who in the world can exercise power over him? He who rules himself rules over the whole world.
Vinoba Bhave
Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise.
Sigmund Freud Follow your dreams, work hard, practice and persevere. Make sure you eat a variety of foods, get plenty of exercise and maintain a healthy lifestyle.
Sasha Cohen
I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.
Mark Twain

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover

Funny Quotes From The Hangover


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Title: Funny Quotes From The Hangover
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